Birthday Ode to "Big Daddy" Bach, S. 100

Lyrics
Good evening, friends and neighbors

Thanks for coming to this little shindig

One hundred years ago today my father was born

And though he long since died

And though his music died with him

Yet his memory lingers on

Everyone always used to say what a great man he was

What a pious individual

Like gag me with a spoon

I always thought he was an incredible stodge

But with the benefit of hindsight

And the knowledge that he won't come back

He looks a whole lot better

So now with the help of my brother Johann Christoph Friedrich

And my sisters Elisabeth Juliane Friederica and Regina Susanna

And, uh, all these other people

I would like to present an ode

To my dear departed daddy

Hoch soll er leben, hoch soll er leben

Dreimal hoch!

Hoch soll er leben, hoch soll er leben

Dreimal hoch!

High may he flourish, high may he flourish

Three times high (Hi! Hi! Hi!)

High may he flourish, high may he flourish

Three times high

If daddy were alive today

This here is what we all would say:

Hoch soll er leben, hoch soll er leben

Dreimal hoch!

Though thirty-five years have come and gone

Since daddy died his name lives on

Hoch soll er leben, hoch soll er leben

Dreimal hoch!

When times are tough and things get bad

It's nice to have a famous dad

High may he flourish, high may he flourish

Three times high

High, high, high

High, high, high

High, high, high

Three times high

High, high, high

Three times high

Higher, highest

High, high

High, high

High, high

Three times high

Number one, yes

Three times high

Nummer ein, jah

Three times high

Numero uno, sí

Three times high

Ichiban, hai!

Happy birthday, happy birthday, happy birthday dad

Happy birthday, happy birthday, happy birthday dad

Happy birthday, happy birthday, happy birthday dad

Hoch soll er leben, hoch soll er leben

Dreimal hoch!

His virtues were so plain to see

But still and all no saint was he

Though he was good I must confess

To feelings of resentfulness

He taught us music note by note

So we could copy what he wrote

His praise for me was always faint

Now my stuff's played and his stuff ain't

High may he flourish, high may he flourish

Three times high

High may he flourish, high may he flourish

Three times high

High

High, high, high

[spoken, a la circus ringmaster]

And now, ladies and gentlemen, for your listening amusement and amazement, The Greater Hoople Area Off-Season Philharmonic is proud to present the cellos and contra basses in 3/4 time, the trumpets and upper strings in 6/8 time, the basses and altos in 2/4 time [Happy birthday, happy birthday, happy birthday Dad], the sopranos and tenors in 3/2 time [Happy birthday, etc.] and the soloists in 4/4 time [Hoch soll er leben, etc].

[sung]

High may he flourish, high may he flourish

Three times

''Hip, hip hooray! Hip, hip hooray! Hip, hip hooray!''

High

Talkin' 'bout